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12/04/2009

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Katherine

Your letter is beautiful and poignant and sad. My first daughter was 9 weeks old when my husband was diagnosed with cancer. It was a familiar evil in my life, as I had lost my Father and my Mother's best friend to this disease. All I knew of cancer was death and I was stunned, shaken, scared. So many words I could use to describe, but at the time there was none that truly fit the bill. He battled this disease and refused to ever admit defeat. He did all that his doctors asked and went beyond if there was even a remote glimmer of hope to be had. He refused to label himself as sick and lived each moment to his end. We got pregnant with a second child half-way through his interferon treatment and we rejoiced, refusing to think of life as anything other than life and a gift. She was his beautiful gift to me, but unfortunately my two daughters and I lost this precious soul when my babies were 2 1/2 years and 10 months old. This was eight months after they suggested he might be in remission.

While many a day I have struggled with my lot in life and this huge loss for myself and my girls, I have been surprised to find much beauty and love. I too have had many reiki and therapeutic touch treatments and they have helped to heal some of the sorrow that seemed to constantly leak from me. So many times people have called me strong and I railed against it. I did not want to be strong. I was strong because I had to be. I did not want to be strong, but I was. Kind and loving individuals have entered my life and shown me the beauty and energy that exists all around us. Yoga has given me loving kindness and I am grateful. Love is precious. My husband loved me and loves me still. While not here in body, he is with me still and will be as long as I need him. He will be forever. I still feel pain at the word cancer, but am now at a point where I find it hard to call it insidious. It has brought me much hurt, but it has given me many gifts. The love that has graced my world is overwhelming. I wish you love, strength and compassion in your journey. While some call it a fight, as I have at times, it comes to me now that it is moreso a challenge, a gift, a new path to discover yourself. I wish you well and much insight on your path.

Kelly

Katherine,
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I felt a well of emotions for you and your girls when I was reading. I'm glad to know that you feel your husband with you.

It's so strange--my husband and I have said many times that this experience is a gift because we just truly see how much we love our life. You know that it's not that simple, though. You are far more articulate and insightful than I am--I am striving to learn more about myself every day.

Jenna :)

(tears)...there are no words...

Erin

Kelly is my creative, nurturing, amazing sister...and she just told me about Garden Mama's blog and the Wellness Tree project so I had to check it out tonight! I am the analytical sister who wishes she were more creative :)

It is so touching to read about the project and also the kind comments from everyone. I had not read the letter she wrote to Ari before, myself, so I sit here crying - she always knows the right thing to say to touch your heart and I am so proud at how strong she is.

Sarah

beauty and grace.
may good health surround in the coming year.
thank you for sharing your strength.

Ginny

What an absolutely beautiful letter. You are in my prayers.

Yesenia Vasquez

Your letter is beautiful. It made me cry. I was also at work. Hope you are doing better. You have inspired me to write a letter to my nursing son. We have been nursing for 7 months.

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The Wellness Project


.: Sentiments From Kelly's Best Friend:.

  • "It's like we are in a hot air balloon and cancer is a lead weight and then everyone's loving thoughts and actions are like the flame from the burner, lifting us up higher than we started."